Weekly Note 28 | பேரன்பு, மன சோகத்தில் வாயின் சந்தோசம், புகைவண்டி சந்திப்புகள்

I have been facinated with Ram’s films. I have not liked a director so much to follow their trajectory so far. From Kattradhu Tamil and Taramani to Peranbu and Parandhu Po (both of which I watched this week). I will passionately wait to encounter some of these characters in my life. There is great care, love and patience in many of his characters. Some things I hope to be, some things that I hope nature bestows on me.

In Peranbu, Appa says early in the film:

ஒருத்தங்க நீங்க ஏன் மத்தவங்க மாதிரி இல்லனு கேட்கிறது எவ்வளவு பெரிய வன்முறைனு புரிஞ்சிது

Translation: “To ask somebody why you are not like other people, is a great violence done onto them, and I understood that”. Both onto myself and me onto others, I realise the value of not asking this question.

I tell my mother that I need to travel and see many things well, and that is what I feel like what life must be. To which my mother replies: சரி, ஆனா அதுக்கு உனக்கு முதல்ல பொருளாதாரம் வேண்டும்…அதுக்கு என்ன செய்ய போற? At which point I realise that the word for economics, financial wealth and other related notions is Porul + Aatharam (thing + proof) in Tamil. I found it facinating that the word for finances also conveys the notion of ‘proving’ to another.

The past week was a tumultous week for my mindvoice, it wavered with no intention or passion, simply being led by inertia, a feeling of sad and annoyance that engulfed me. I found good food and a disgruntled stomach to be my cyclic companions. I want more, says the mouth. I could be happier with less, says the tummy.

I had a chat with a berth-companion on the train back from Bidar. A large land-holding farmer who’d moved back to his village in Bidar district during lockdown. We talked about natural farming, his children, his charity work and business. He had offered me his Roti and Palya. His family had packed 2 too many, and he insisted I share with him. In the train to Bidar, my berth was filled with returning politicans from Bangalore to Gulbarga. They also offered their roti and palya.

The same farmer had also told me of break-in during a riot like situation in Basavakalyan that he had participated in. The mob broke into a Masjid that is being alledged to have been built on top of the Anubhava Mantapa, the notion of a Parliament from Basavanna’s time. This situation follows the blueprint of movements led by the Babri Masjid’s demolition: of contest, of what was before (which is in conflict with the Places of Worship Act), of what must be recovered and slow but periodic erosion and intrusion into places of worship, like the Masjid in Basavakalyan

People are grey…