These 2 weeks have passed like a blur. There has been a stressed undertone when I look back, and too many moments of doubt and confusion. I have been learning a lot of new things, while at the same time it takes a lot out of me. I must balance my heart to worry less. An experiment of printing on transparent sheets in inkjet fails I rode down to Mallasamudram through Hosur, Rayakottai, Salem. It took 5 hours both ways. There was a family gathering, a yearly ritual of praying to the kula-theivam. Riding needs a rested mind, and a worryless mind. Both of which I did not possess, but it was okay, the weather was good, and the road was empty. In the grounds of the temple, Maasaniamman lies on the right, on the left, in the background women are making Pongal My niece roams around on the edges of the ground, to spite her mother. Her version of fun is to spite. I have been thinking about agency a lot these past weeks. Shreyas noted from his experience at Srishti, that the agency of the learner was of prime importance. I am faltering to create that environment in my class. ...

These 2 weeks have been a lesson in the necessity for the rigour of planning. I do not enjoy the stress of delayed work, especially delays that I find hard to control. The soil around the Srishti Manipal campus is getting held tighter. By the occasional rain and the ocassional tilling and the ocassional building. I have started as a Creative Peer at Srishti. I am going to spend a few months teaching and working on the Observer. Planning and designing courses is a good way to jiggle life around, it puts me in a different space. This course, title “A Critical History of your Constituency”, is planned to initiate enquiry into the everyday functioning and constituting of the country from the closest possible place. Your MLA and your assembly constituency. What is happening in your neighbourhood? How are they affected by the many acts of governance? This is a list of questions learners are expected to answer through maps of their neighbourhoods I have come up with a definition of vibe coding for myself, so that I do not engage in it in the future. I am tired of it. ...

After a month of peaceful protests, police-action induced violence, and a powerful march to the parliament, the youth have successfully made a minister take accountability. At Freedom Park, a hardworking print-maker, Y, makes copies of the Preamble of the Constitution for people to carry home. He invites policemen, and all the people who curious look at the screen print to make their own copies. There is a sense of hope in the air, and a sudden grounding of power. Quite suddenly, questions of prosecution are no longer fear inducing, there is companionship in numbers. There is space for cynicism, there is space for hopelessness still, but a large component of the feeling I am sensing is hope. ...

Some cows are prayed to Some cows are tied up far away from their children Days whiz past my memory. Too many varieties of rice on the plate. Much of this week has been a digital prison. Seeing the protests in Jantar Mantar, hearing of them, through friends, through twitter, through real time reporting. I have not been able to contribute in time, resources or work and it makes me feel small. This has been an unforeseen movement in time, there is hope in the air. I write about it in this post: Post resignation: Thousands of people listen to a student from the North-East, Rohith Vemula’s love letter and more ...

These past weeks, I have been as filled as a leaky clay pot would. I can accept all the water I can, but I would and am still leaking and evaporating all the excess water. I would hold to lose, remember to process and forget. It has been a full many weeks! That is what it has been. I have been working on the Constitutional Observer, packaging for Manesiri, a freelance work for Repair Cafe India and in general the mind has been full with many things. ...

M: A…Which tree is this? M: The bats like it… There is the short nose fruit bat, see?! A: Hmmm…. Cherry! This is the Singapore Cherry Tree Malaika has been quizzing me on the Singapore Cherry for a while. I have learnt to recognise it with its jagged leaves and the white flower. Harsha asks me seriously while at S’s farm in Bidar: “You should be able to recognise it!, you have seen it before…take the leaf, smell it, see the flower…” I sensed the disappointment that I could not distinguish between the Drumstick and the Custard leaves at the beginning. He insisted I try and recognise it. ...

I write after eating mochakotta kolambu (lab-lab beans curry) and rasam, from Chennai. It was very well made by S. Even a little of rice is enough to provide a feeling that I do not get with other foods, an over-filled pleasure that is not too harsh, especially when you have it after a monstrous nap. I have found a liking for rice in the past few weeks, my tummy too visibly reflects it. I refrigerate it, and have it with a meal-prepped pot of dal with vegetables, when at home in Bangalore. But I will have to stop having rice, will do. ...

I have not felt guilt like this in a long time. I am a swindler, a lying parotta master. As I try to write here, even my tear ducts fail to successfully produce what they are made for. The emotion is strong enough to make my chest heave and crater everyday, to make my heart feel less and less confident everyday, but it is not enough to make the well of tears overflow.

DMK stickers on the distribution panel in the Anna Nagar Constituency, inbetween the noise of normal advertising The Constitutional Observer received a grant from the Nagarathna Memorial Grant. It was unexpected and has come at a period of time where it is most crucial. The Observer now has a vision that we are looking for people to participate in. We would like to work with lawyers, designers, activists, policy experts, ecologists, people of all kinds who work with policy and government functioning to help us build towards it. I will share more details soon. If you are interested in knowing more, email me! A NTK ad. They have continued winning no seats in this election also. An AI filled ADMK ad. The results of the TN election have been most unexpected! ...

My first attentive introduction to the person Dr. Bhim Rao Ambedkar is, is with the Constitutional Observer, I am learning who he was, and what he is now to people from the places I visit. I did not grow up with such a consciousness, so I must learn now. I must also learn what he means to my own politics. This is simply a collection of my own experiences during the Ambedkar jayanti Celebrations this year. Of course it is a lot of questions and observations that only people who have lived in Bidar may fully understand. ...