The most comfortable mornings will begin with the rubbing of the feet. If I don’t immediately open my phone, and don’t remember what awaits to be done that day and jump out, it is a good day. If the rubbing of the feet leads to slowly-opened eye lids looking at the glowing trees outside, and 5 minutes spent like an hour - it is a good morning. But my mornings have been filled with a sense of worry. I do not look forward to sleep, but worry that I sleep too much. The 5 minutes I want to spend, but make it feel like an hour? It becomes an actual, real hour. The real is not so much wonder, but worry of losing it. I look forward to a rubbing-of-the-feet that makes the chest heave with no worry of the future. ...

It has been many weeks of great company. It has also been many weeks of great learning and great teachers. The rain has taught me to drive slowly, calmly and most importantly the gentleness of a focussed mind. My eyes naturally enquire about the grasses and the trees, and my enquries are answered. M and H annotate those enquiries. H particularly takes an interest and questions me later, so that I remember. I have cooked food many times and have had food cooked for me many times. It was a particularly warm set of weeks in the unusual cold of Blr. ...

Somewhere along the Hessaraghatta reservoir, we look into water. It is sandy where we stand, sandy enough to worry me that the drizzling rain will make it soft and marshy. We’d only discovered that there is a path after seeing a few other people walking out onto the road from this side. Near the Durgamba Devi temple, a well and two people.There is a path on the embankment where most people walk. There is also a path below the embankment that gives access to the few farm houses, cattle sheds and coconot/palm plantations that line the side. This Ganesh Chaturthi, there is a remnant of a procession in every street. Streets are lit up, there are some streets that I have never seen so brightly lit with festival lighting in the last few years. Close to my home, there is the Chickabettahalli Jamia Masjid, that is right on the BEL - AFS - Vidyaranyapura - Yelahanka road. The road is a sharp white line of seggregation. You will not find so many muslims on the east side of the road, while the western side is not so fancy looking. The left side is also the Chickabettahalli village. For Ganesh processions, there is a lot of police personnel who have been stationed all along the road. And there is a van of personnel who stay opposite the mosque, all evening, and possibly all night. It is everybody’s wonder why they stay in front of a mosque during ganesh processions. ...

This past week has been tiring and filled. I’ve realised that I need to consciously seek out my free time, my aspirations and my imaginations. I realise this in the background of feeling all over the place in the amorphous sphere of what is the professional and the personal. I also realise that personal desires and validation may not come from what is a moral value you place on something. I can place moral value in something that I do, but does it excite me? I’m not sure. Not always. This ofcourse comes from the great privilege of being able to do what excites me for work and life and get paid for it. ...